A typical day on the historic (i.e. older than 1990) downtown mall. I don’t see many pedestrians. I do see a road and a truck. The road is being repaired. You know how it goes when all those cars and trucks zoom along the pedestrian mall. I guess we’ll be getting some good potholes this winter (assuming we have a winter). I hope pedestrians don’t get hit by cars sliding along the icy road.
When will the village elders rename this chuck of road the historic strip mall? One of the new tenants (a cheesy sort of place that takes reservations) of the strip mall was pretty upset with the lack of parking for customers. Maybe the customers just don’t like paying $8 for a 1.5 hour dining experience in this friendly little village. Or maybe they just don’t want to park next to the Friendly Court…or even Court Square where a guy with a nascar jacket tried to shoot his girlfriend. She was almost Daled.
Four notes on this story: 1. If your girlfriend knows enough about handguns to jam her hand between the hammer and chamber, she’s a good woman and you shouldn’t kill her. Either that, or you should get an automatic with an internal hammer. 2. If your parents named you Elvis, you are automatically held to a higher standard and that makes this story even more tragic. 3. I recommend the death penalty, because although we can’t hope to catch Texas, we can’t let Oklahoma take over second place. 4. If you’re able to appear ‘out of no where’, as the story suggests, and you’re able to assault people in Court Square without being captured, you should get a better outfit because you’d make a pretty good super-villain.
So that’s like the most excitement in Court Square in, what, 250 years?
Meanwhile, “He was last seen wearing a black leather dale Earnhardt jacket #3, blue jeans and tennis shoes.”
Yeah, that really narrows it the frig down. A guy dressed like that will really stand out in the Village for being so different.
Ha! Cletus, you are so right, in so many ways. For that matter, so are you TJ. All I know is that this would appear to run counter to the “Shifflett Rule.” The Shifflett’s with two F’s and two T’s are supposed to be the classy ones. Or so I’ve heard. Maybe the other non-double-F-and-T ones are stalking their ex’s in the Walmart parking lot, instead.
One should always pay tons of money to eat fondue. You know, melted cheese for a $100.00 a person. With all the great places to eat in cville, why would you do something that you can have at home for a few buck an a fondue set from Target?
Cletus – that’s about the funniest thing I’ve read in quite some time. Thank you.
–Jim
Seeing how this is the second time Dan has referenced fondue in a negative way, I’m thinking he’s had a bad experience with it recently.
C’mon, Dan, open up. Release your pent up fondue anger.
Or better yet, start a blog. You could call it “Fondon’t”
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The Downtoan Mall is So-SoHo.