Although most of the local authorities won’t say it publicly, I’ve been in contact with one individual who is willing to state the truth: goats were the cause for our recent financial disaster here in C-Ville.
During the middle of the day the financial sector of downtown was evacuated due to sewage issues. Locals couldn’t get money. Computers had to be shut down. With no money the local establishments had no incoming cash and people had to be let go. It was chaos. When they reopened the bank panic ensued – people were wondering if the money was really safe.
My source tells me that this sewage problem was due excessive crap (similar in nature to DBM Band issue) of goats! Goats are the story of 2010 here in the village. Almost everyone now has a goat in their yard. Goat attacks are becoming common.
Although whispers are dangling in the light winter breeze, it looks as if the goats are now after our water supply. Excessive poop has caused unequal pressures in the pipes of the community, and this led to the breakage of a big water pipe (or ‘mater’ as it appears in the opening sentence) in the downtown area.
Will castrated hornless goats be the end of the good life in C-Ville? I guess we’ll find out in 2011. Stay tuned for more stories on disasters caused by our local goat explosion!