outskirts: life and times in charlottesville

In an effort to make C-Ville a more pedestrian-friendly village 58 people were in court the other day that had been ticketed for trespassing on the railroad tracks behind the Corner.

A tipster reports that in 2007 the city police wrote 8 tickets to drivers for failing to yield to pedestrians and 12 so far in 2008.

I know I was sprinting as fast as I could the other night to get across the tracks to X-Lounge. Was I breaking the law just to get a drink? I recall a lot of cars hitting bicyclists over the past few years, and the drivers never get tickets. Why should pedestrians have to fight with the low quality drivers around here. A train seems like a vastly better risk.

I’m still peeved that the village won’t let people walk across the tracks under the Belmont bridge. When one is trying to catch a bus you have to walk through the musical marshmallow, and the crapshawvian rules force you to walk all the way around it during pointless performances. I was late for my bus the other day. If the city would just add a pedestrian walkway under the bridge life would be so much better. But I keep forgetting the goal of the village is to destroy the quality of existence.

No one gets hurt. Let pedestrians walk across tracks. How else could that Stephen King movie get made? Does the village want to stifle Hollywood?

In typical C-Ville fashion I have gotten this info from a reliable source:

… the woman who claimed she had been bitten by a stray pit bull has been charged with filing a false report. She was bitten by her own dog. She also claimed that she was getting rabies shots.

Hmm…I wonder if I should ever claim that the groundhog that lives in my back yard attacked me. Speaking of which, I startled it when I was coming home the other evening and it climbed up in to a tree. I’d never seen that before.

No, not the bar, just the sound of a few bullets on another evening in the village. Two men shot. White t-shirts.

Remember, never trust anyone in a white t-shirt.

Seems like one to two players get arrested every week. This was for stealing/drinking booze at Club 216.

Will good old boy Groh have enough players this year? At least the season is almost here.

Earlier in the week I’d predicted that due to the heat there would be at least one (and probably two) gang attacks. Looks like I was right. One person shot dead last night.

Whatever you do, never sit outside a restaurant after 8pm around here. Commonwealth drive seems to be the new hotbed of crime. A shooting last weekend, a gang attack last night. With the continued heat I am predicting at least one gang attack near the downtown mall this weekend, although I’d put my money on two.

Seems as if La Taza was robbed. Nothing like good old safe Belmont where real estate assessments go up 20% every year, and crime goes up by the same amount.

C-Ville tribal elders love claiming that C-Ville is tops in this and tops in that. I’m sure they will be happy that we are no where to be found in the Best Small Cities in America for 2008 list.

Why are we not in there? Well, that is an easy answer. We don’t qualify as a small city. To be a small city you have to have 50k to 300k people. C-Ville only has around 39.9k. The elders had to fight the government over this number, so they will claim 41k but we know that isn’t the case.

Where is the list for Best Villages in America? I bet we are in that list. Of course the local gang activity (for 12-14 year old bangers) or mob beatings (involving guns and high-heeled shoes as weapons!) of the village might hurt our chances. Just never leave your house after 8pm and the village is lovely…right?

I constantly wonder why the nightlife around here gets such a bad rap for shootings, stabbings, and gang warfare. This past Saturday night only had three arrested at one location. Mama Mia’s.

I guess one just wanted to say thanks for the music, another just wanted the money, money, money, and the third decided the winner takes it all and ran off with the spare m. I’d go on…but I’m tired and can feel that you, my readers, are slipping through my fingers.

Are you ready for the movie about this? Just a few weeks away.

Seems as if the mall has now become a place to steal/kidnap kids. This establishment is well known for being a very kid friendly place, to the point where it is fine to change a baby’s diaper right on the table.